I’ve lived almost 40 full years at this point, so I guess I know some stuff. Here are five things I know to be true:
- Saying goodbye is the worst…most of the time. I had to say goodbye to a friend last week. When you say goodbye, you never know if/when you will see a person again. This is difficult for me…as I assume it is difficult for most of the human race. There are very few times I’ve had an easy time saying goodbye. There was that one step-father, that one crazy guy I dated for a month and a handful of high level obnoxious students over the past 13 years. Otherwise, I like people to stay around.
- What you believe about things changes over time. So many things. So many times. I have come to a place in life where I never want to be more than 99.8% sure of anything because that way, there’s always room to grow.
- Driving in LA really does get easier. The first time I drove into the city, I thought I’d die. Literally. But I learned how to have traffic zen and now driving 45 minutes to get somewhere important seems pretty typical. Also…when you only have to drive 17 minutes, it feels like a gift.
- Seasons come and season go. I have a tendency to sit in the misconception that things (bad and good) last forever. But I also (when I sit and remember for a moment) realize that this is entirely untrue. I’ve had a lot of moments of “it’s always going to be this way and I can’t change anything and I just can’t go on!” and then I remind myself that that is a lie. Tomorrow and next week and next year will probably be different than today…so it’s good to pay attention.
- I will never really get over my need for a dad. Even when my dad has disappeared from my life (sometimes literally, often figuratively), I’ve still had a deep longing for connection to him and a meaningful relationship. At some point, I came to embrace that he could not be who he was not, and there was freedom in that. But there will still always be a part of me that wishes things were as they were “meant to be.”
- (Bonus thing.) Laughter and friendship really are two of the best medicines for whatever ails you.